The holidays are wonderful with their twinkly lights, hot cocoa, festive music, and seventeen different relatives asking if you really need another Christmas tree. (Yes, Brenda, I do. Don’t question my process.)

But let’s be honest: the holidays can also be a lot. There’s planning, cooking, cleaning, wrapping, accidentally eating the chocolate Santas you swore was for guests, recovering from that one cookie exchange where everyone brought the same recipe. It's definitely chaos in cinnamon and pine-scented form.

Which is why the smart people (us) know the secret to surviving the season: Read murder mysteries. I have a few reasons for this theory, so, hear me out.

Murder Mysteries Are Cheaper Than Therapy (And Don’t Require Pants)

During the holidays, you’ll need an escape. Something soothing. Something calming. Something where the most stressful question is: Which suspect is lying? Not, How many fruit cakes must I pretend to like? The answer, by the way, is zero. Own it if you like them or if you don’t. 

This is infinitely more relaxing than the regular holiday questions I ask every year. Where did I hide the gift? Why is the dog eating ribbon? Why is my brother talking about politics again?

Open a book, and bam! You’re somewhere else. Preferably somewhere charming with snowflakes, cozy fireplaces, a quirky sleuth, and a suspiciously large number of bodies for such a small town. I’m not opposed to a more grittier mystery thriller either. 

They’re relaxing for many reasons, but mostly because they’re not your life and you can think,  Well, at least my life is murder-free. Probably.

Solving Fictional Crimes Feels Productive Without Actually Doing Anything

Holiday to-do lists are overwhelming, right? You’ve got to buy gifts, bake cookies, pretend you like fruitcake, pray the tree stays upright this year, and don’t scream when the neighbor inflates their fifteenth light-up snowman. But when you read a murder mystery you become a detective simply by sitting down and turning pages. You’re accomplishing something with absolutely no real-world effort. You find clues. You form theories. You outsmart the (fictional) police.

Frankly, you should be awarded a badge.

Holiday Cozy Murder Mysteries Have the Best Vibes

They do. If you haven’t read them, you’ll find a ton of holiday stuff like snowy small towns, gingerbread contests, hot cocoa, ugly sweaters, and of course, murder. They’re like Hallmark, but with death and red herrings.  You still get warm fuzzy feelings, just with a body or two. The perfect balance of cozy and chaos, which is what every holiday is already, right?

Murder Mysteries Are 100% Family Drama–Free

No one in the book is making passive-aggressive comments about your weight or your life choices. No one is asking why you're still reading those little crime books.
And best of all, none of the characters are related to you, but even if they were a plot twist could take care of that.

Reading Gives You an Excuse to Hide

Your family will think you’re taking time for self-care or enjoying a good book.
They won’t know you’re actually, avoiding dish duty, escaping the wrapping-paper explosion, ignoring cousin Tiffany’s gluten-free, sugar-free, joy-free dessert, and/or pretending not to hear the argument about who ruined last year’s casserole. All because your face is in a book.

And Finally… Murder Mysteries Make You Appreciate Your Own Family

Nothing says my relatives aren’t so bad like reading about greedy heirs, backstabbing bakers, murderous mayors, and neighbors hiding bodies behind the compost bin. 

Suddenly, your brother’s questionable political opinions feel downright charming.

So, this holiday season escape the chaos and embrace the crime.

Curl up with a mug of something warm, dig into a juicy murder mystery, and let the festive homicides soothe your frazzled spirit. Happy reading, and may your holidays be merry, bright, and entirely murder-free, unless you’re reading about it.